Why did I take her for granted, why didn't I savor those
moments when she would hold my hand?? When she would look to me for guidance on
how to deal with selfish kids, how to buckle herself in, how to cut her food!!
I know this probably sounds like I'm talking about her in passing but in
reality those moments are gone, they are only memories now.
During her second day of school something very unsettling
happened. During the playground hours she opened the gate and started walking
out. This was definitely a good reason to pull her out. But was I being
unreasonable? I did not feel that my child was safe at the school so we
transferred her to my number once choice school. It was closer and a lot more
expensive but was it worth it knowing I had peace of mind?
The expensive school was like eye candy for any kid or
parent. My darling loved being there. The program even reminded me of a Russian
pre-school I used to attend as a toddler. The structure of this facility was
just what I wanted for my little free spirit.
As each day went on, I started looking for flaws of this
school also, trying to find a reason to withdraw her. I pep talked myself out
of it. I don't want to show my daughter my insecurities. It is not my
personality to bounce around from one thing to the next. So I knew this was it
and I had to commit and stop looking for a way out.
A whole week of school went by. My darling seemed to behave
so much better at home. I look forward to spending time with her every day
after school. I have more patience for her and my attention is 100% on her when
she is with me. My relationship with her has drastically improved and getting
more hugs from her means the world to me!
This change was not easy, especially for me but it has
helped me grow and appreciate my love bug even more. I guess its true what they
say, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder!"
What a great story and I hope you stick with this school :)
ReplyDeletethanks Micheline! I am definitely sticking with this school. Time has helped me cope and made me realize I need to get ready for Lex!
ReplyDelete